My Poetic Perspective

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What If you were still here

Sometimes I think..

 

What if

 

You were still here?

 

How would I smile at you?

 

Hug you?

 

I’d tell you how strong you are

 

I know..

 

You Sighed through those years

 

Grinned and bared sorrows I never

 

Understood

 

How is it

 

I know you more

 

now

 

Than when you were breathing

 

Trying to stay alive

 

You were Quiet and alone

 

in your head

 

Most of the time

 

You were there, a safe silence

 

Quiet tears

 

You always wanted to be strong

 

But Life broke your pride

 

It made you cry

 

It made you scream why

 

Papa, to me you were brave

 

You bore through the fires

 

Burning from worry

 

If we would be ok

 

And never knowing if you’ll ever make it through

 

I miss you

 

I Miss the way you laughed, the way you

 

Joked around, it was your way

 

To love me

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Looking Beyond the Ceiling

Bright eyes still needing answers
Chasing meaning in these walls..

Sudden soul speaks finally
This Quickening heart I almost feel

Maybe it’s time to shed some tears
Maybe the clock knows I’ll bend my skin

So fragile here

So breakable and tender
This darkness keeps me there

As the stars pours and flows the floods of
Grief

Every sorrow
Before my soul they show their faces.

Like loosely time flies by, so quickly
Age grows

It never pauses to let you feel

Never let’s me savor the moments that
Prick my heart to listen

It reminds me I can never hold time to please me

All is fleeting, and heaven only knows those moments that you bring you to your knees

Are the moments that save you everytime.

It Keeps Passing By

I thought that time could not follow..

But It chases me

In Moments that I thought I could hold onto

There they go

Slipping through crooked hands

All is not what it is supposed to be

……I’m smaller

Full of fears and years of tears

Mounds of sorrow,

Pain in eyes hopeful and pleading

As it comes to these

Longings

Missing innocence

And Strength

Missing days when I thought I could

Never reach this day

But it flows on by

Time with it’s hurried way

Making joys and shedding skins

It keeps on picking up speed, this phenomenon of time

Passing chances, passing life

Passing me by

It keeps passing me by

 

 

Fare Thee Well

 It is not me anymore

Waving my hand as reflected

Motions sway in the window

Across the bridge way;

Distance became one day

And I knew I wasn’t the same

The Morning Fight

My soul wrestles again

The competing forces resume their stance

At war once more

And I am tired of this battle

To keep me away from grace

 

Though in agony and persistence

I muster syllables of pleas to help me

As the calling to live without you

Echoes louder day by day

 

Let me not pass you by

No Longer You

I lived 

Among rags and grey 

breaths exhaled 

proved that life was lived 

I panted with an urgency 

And failed to leave proof along some past. 

I didn’t recognize myself 

In memories of blur and jagged scenes

Every gone second an echo 

Of someone who waits to be awaken….

Sleep on forbidden dream 

Stay in a stiff death

I am no longer you 

Reflection


This is one of the scenes that pop up in life that I love. It often goes unnoticed but when it comes I quietly and secretly hold its short lived gentle existence of lighted beauty…. Its like a poem waiting to be written. And I think I have written some while gazing. Then it fades with only the dimming of dusk filling the room. They are never recorded on paper. It’s only between the light and I. And during moments of being in bed because of fatigue, the shadow of dancing leaves, and light seeping in through the blinds on a certain hour of the day, pulls me away inviting my heart to lend itself to honest words; things my heart remembers or can’t help to remember. I try to watch it as long as I can… relishing the color of orange light, enjoying the artistic presence as the dimming day introduces itself once again to the quiet night hours. I’ll greet it again and I know that special quiet will write a memory or reflection of thoughts only I have known and felt. Again, I will have known myself a little bit more, to be in the barely lit room vulnerable to no one but God who speaks so gently through these moments.

Not By Me

Deep are things that run through me
As heavens light pours awakening love
In this room
Where I have watched myself
Wrestle, tossed against the walls of pride

But they crumble
They fall
Not by me, not by my thoughts that
Run unstable and frail

I never had what it takes to break the hold
I only asked
In whimpers and breakable skin
No thunder or lightning comes
Nothing by earth or my wits end

No

Only You

Just Say, There are more Days

Long tears fall

we are all fragile today

as my heart refuses to rest

 

I go on, grasping strength

 

evidence of true love speaks

in the night’s quiet resolve

when finally the mind is alone

when the heart could hear my thoughts

 

the world does not pause

no life slows to help me keep up

 

something is missing from the air I breathe

as Minutes say goodbye too fast like miles of years passing

Under the breeze of heaven’s whisper

 

Just say, there are more days

 

make up for what was lost

Theres so much to say

Its Not Over Yet

No remedy for time

not even these eyes

that spill out sorrows

as pleading to halt this disease

 

All in a moments resign, nothing is more important

than to see life sing again

 

beyond fears

beyond these things that cause so much pain

 

we wonder

where is the relief

 

come settle me down, settle me here sweet God of mine

all the earth is weeping

Wanting to bring back laughing scenes

 

Don’t farewell

give it time

hope needs to revive me awake

 

to bear this up, bear this life

it’s not over yet